One of Patty’s good friends Shari Teigman is on the podcast. She is a performance coach and creative business strategist who teaches the Maverick Method to become the optimal you for your optimal life and business.
She works with high level CEOs, entrepreneurs and startups to unleash their inner Maverick and to remove the bottlenecks that keep them stuck and small to catapult into the next level of well-being and success in all areas.
Shari says she’s practical and woo and likes connecting with others who understand how we’re all a bit of both. She explains she has full belief and also can have resistance to all of it.
That’s why she found Receiving School so helpful.
You’ll be inspired when you hear how Shari followed her intuition when visiting her family. It’s just one way the universe helped her be where she needed to be, even when she didn’t understand why.
When she surrendered, by force (her words) she received the clarity and support she needed. Signs, support, and love was everywhere, and Shari was able to truly receive it.
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0:00
The level of standing up for myself and her and owning what I deserve and facing all of the parts of me all the things that Patty teaches in receiving school came with such force. All of this is so hard for me. And there, none of it was it was like I was suspended above. And the nurse felt the energy and also saw my hysterical tears. They let me stay and just close the curtain like that does not happen. But it came with such clarity and such intense energy that there was not an option for No, there was I mean, talk about universal 100% Like, I was fully there, there was no worrying about anyone else. There was no it was my mother. That was it, whatever it was gonna take.
0:45
Welcome to the space for magic podcast where people who are led by their hearts come to learn the secrets to receiving all the gifts the universe has for us. I’m your host, Patty Lennon. I’m an X type a corporate banker turned intuitive coach, using a blend of common sense brain science and just a dash of magic. I’m here to help you create abundance in every area of your life, and business. Welcome.
1:17
Hey, everyone, welcome to this episode of the space for magic podcast. I’m your host, Patty Lennon. And today I have one of my very, very good friend Shari Teigman here with me, and Shari’s here for a couple of reasons. First of all, she is just a wonderful, wonderful human being, and I love talking to her. And I know you’re gonna love hearing her story. And also, she is someone that has gone through the receiving school and has a fascinating experience with it. But before we get into that, let me tell you that Shari is someone that you might recognize as kind of your best friend in the world. If you’re lucky enough to identify with Shari as a human, then I consider you, you very privileged, because she is just one of these very fun, exciting individuals on the planet. She is a performance specialist, she is a creativity coach. And, you know, when she goes out in the world, she really does it in her own way in her own style, and doesn’t make any bones about it. So with that, welcome Shari.
2:29
Well, that was an intro and a half. Thank you very much, Patty Lennon, I love being here with you.
2:35
Well, thank you, thank you, thank you. So there’s been so much that’s developed in your life, especially say over the last year, year and a half, I don’t even know where to start. But I guess where it kind of started to fall into place or not fall into place. That’s not the right words. But like, where things start to shift for you radically, that’s what I would say is, you know, when your mom ended up in the hospital, and we’ll get to that, but I do want to kind of go back a little bit further, in that, I. So for you listening, Shari and I are friends, you know, she’s taken receiving school, but we’re also friends outside of receiving school. So I know we’re in a couple of different contexts. And there was an ancestor of yours that, you know, multiple times when we’d be talking and you’d be communicating a certain level of, uh, I can’t trust you know, sort of the magic of the world. Because, you know, let me I won’t put words in your mouth, you talk about like, those early days, like, that was,
3:37
this is interesting. So you and I met a few years ago, I don’t even remember not knowing you. So I couldn’t even put a date on it. It was our friendship was one of those like, Oh, there you are, I’ve been looking for you my whole life. So it’s just very instantaneous. And I think you and I have a lot of similarities. We are very practical. And then we’re also very woowoo. So it’s funny to have a friendship where like you go both lanes where you can be cursing about something ridiculous to each other. And then there’s always the spiritual side of it that we can both click into. Patty clicks into it more than I remember to let’s just be honest here. And you know, we run things by each other creatively. And we can both see each other stuff very well. So although I am very nice, so that was very nice. I am very friendly and connected to connecting with people. That’s a big thing of mine. It’s harder and more rare for me to let someone in fully because I’ve been in performance mode A lot of my life. So when Patti and I got close, it was this instant. I showed her everything and I don’t usually show people a lot and when we met it was a challenging time in my life with relationships and with some family stuff and I felt very messy, and it felt very uncomfortable to let someone in so deeply and being friends with Patti. You don’t get the option beautifully to close off. because she always knows what’s happening, even if you don’t talk to her, she’s a perfect friend for me because it can’t even lie or pretend because she’s like, okay, but also what’s happening. And she doesn’t let me deflect. So early days, you were still doing more like the business side of coaching. And I visibly remember, I was in my basement, I’m in my basement at the moment in my office, and I’m looking towards the closet that I was decluttering. And you called me on a weekend, we were just chatting to catch up. And you were telling me that receiving school came to you, we were actually talking about the domain name, I remember what I was taking off my shelf. And it just like hit me between the eyes. So I’ve done a lot of spiritual and energetic work. And I love it. And there’s always more to go. And I’m very feisty and very resistant in the sense that I believe in this stuff wholeheartedly. And I also believe wholeheartedly that it doesn’t either apply to me or work for me. So I have this duality of full belief in the process and the magic, and then also full resistance in, nothing’s ever going to change for me to a degree of up until a certain point it will always stay the same. And I think that the reason I was open to the idea was not I think the only reason I was open to the idea was because it was you. So I know you weren’t going to be fluffy and I know it wasn’t going to be the same. Respectfully, have happy affirmations and declutter your closet and you know, click your heels three times, and then everything magically goes. But it was the depths in which why receiving happened and at the time I had gone through the death of your dad with you and you know, watched you put a launch down, active surrender for an overachiever. And I’m like, okay, my girl can do this. Maybe this is something that I can if I’m going to do with anyone, I can try to see what’s going to maybe possibly happened here with me. So let’s say that was that was the beginnings of what was coming.
6:54
Yeah. And because I do want to bring in the fact that you were like, I think it’s your grandmother. I think that’s where we landed not your great grandmother, and she’s popped in multiple times. And she’s very insistent that she’s there to help you heal. So this is definitely like this resistance to receiving or it being easier. This stuff working, we knew was an ancestral wound, you know, it wasn’t just you in this lifetime wound. And I’m trying to remember what happened where you were like, Okay, I’m gonna go down to Florida. And you’re like, I’m gonna go for a week at that time to see your, your parents and
7:33
you don’t even remember that this is what happens. So this was mid COVID, COVID, started, let’s say March 2020. My son, my youngest son, my oldest son was in university doing his own thing. My younger son just graduated high school in the middle of COVID. That was his senior year. And he went to a gap year in Israel. And he left on September 1. And I, you and I were talking over the summer, an empty nest, motherhood is a big deal to me, empty nest was freaking the hell out of me. And you and I were talking over the summer, and I’m literally didn’t know what I was going to do. And you said, why don’t you go visit your parents? And you said, I don’t even know if you remember this. You said, You need to go to your parents. And I’m like, it’s the middle of COVID. I’m not freaking them out. I don’t want to travel. And you kept saying you’re gonna stay with your parents and like, Patty, I’ll go for a few days, but I’m not staying with my parents. And I got, of course, you know, feisty Shari way. I’m like, Patty, just because you can see stuff doesn’t mean that’s what’s gonna be. Your one would think after all these years, I would learn to actually listen, I listen retroactively. So I’ll remember she said it, but I won’t listen in the moment. And you kept saying no, no, I think you should go stay with your parents. So it was before Rosh Hashanah, which is the Jewish holiday, my my son had just left and I said, You know what, I’m going to go down to my parents for a few days. I went down with just literally a small carry on. I had a five day trip booked, return ticket home, I get to Florida. With my parents. I’m working from there. And I hadn’t seen my parents in nine months, and I miss them terribly. We’re hanging out. And one night, I work during the day and in the evening. They live right on the beach, I went for a walk on the boardwalk. And my adorable parents are waiting on their patio waving at me like I’m a celebrity coming in. And I come inside. And now I’m very emotional. I’m exactly my father. My mother is not emotional at all. She’s very warm and loving. But she’s not the crier. She starts crying. And she said You can’t leave. My mother’s not like this. And my dad’s looking at me, I’m looking at him. I’m like, Well, what’s wrong with you? So she said, I need you to stay. I need you to stay and she says the words in Hebrew, Pikuach Nefesh, which is a very big Jewish philosophy of to save a life. Let’s say for example, in Judaism, you can do anything to save a life like you can break Sabbath. You can break kosher rules. It is like the ultimate thing is to save a life. So that phrase is a very big deal in Judaism and it’s like the baseline of like you do anything and she said be Pikuach Nefesh. I’m looking at her like, Ma, she’s getting herself all worked up and she doesn’t. So I said, okay, okay, I’ll stay. Now my parents were due to come a few weeks later because my nephew was getting married. And I’m like, Mom, I’m gonna see you in a couple of weeks. Now I’m usually the clingy attached one. So I said, Okay, relax, I’ll change my flight, and I’ll stay a few more days. So she calmed down, she’s hugging me crying, you don’t know what you did. You don’t know what you did. This was a Tuesday night, Wednesday morning, I changed my flight, I was going to fly home a few days later, Thursday, my mom had a massive seizure in a car with her friend, they were food shopping, and turns out while in the hospital, then had a stroke, I would have already been home, I was supposed to fly Thursday morning. So part of her knew that this was going to happen. And she kind of waited till I was there. My dad and I were taking care of each other, and then whatever needed to happen bodily wise, she let go and have the stroke. But she told me beforehand that she needed me to be there. So this kicked off an entire nine and a half months where I had to give up with love and honor, everything that I thought was in my control, to be there to nurse my mom back to health and to help my dad through the process. And to say it was life changing is I don’t have the words for it. I wish there was new language for it. It pushed up against every sense of control of planning of over achievement of deciding what my life was going to look like of my identity, everything completely stripped away in an instant.
11:36
I’m like speechless, because I realized, as you were telling that story, there was a question in my heart that I’ve never asked you. And you answered it already. But I want to go a little bit deeper. Because my question was, do you think your mom knew? Because I don’t like I haven’t? We haven’t talked about that. And so you already said you do think she knew. And for you listening, you’re both of her parents are? They’re doing well. So just know that Shari’s mom did ultimately recover, though is a credibly long road. Yes. So you do believe that she knew on some level? And so what do you think that knowing is? Do you think it’s human knowing soul knowing more
12:19
this was total soul knowing because my mom is not a she’s very spiritual in a religious sense, but she’s not an intuitive person like that well till the stroke. And then once she was recovering, we had a lot of deep conversations that she no longer has access to. But she was there with me, which was really interesting. This was an absolute soul thing. Or I actually think it was my grandmother, who is her mother, who was a Holocaust survivor who comes up in every intuitive anything I’ve ever done. She’s always right there ever is. And I’ve had many, because I love this stuff. There’s a little lady with white hair. There she is, every time feisty. And I believe this was my grandmother, you know, leading the charge. My mom knew. And again, because it was so out of character was the only reason I listened. We would have left it off, though. Otherwise, it was like something came out of her. It wasn’t her.
13:09
And so leading up to this, you leaving part, like the big struggle, which I think a lot of people can relate to, up until the point that you know, now you’ve got to give up everything to be this caretaker is you needed rest. And yet you kept telling yourself, I can’t slow down, I can’t stop. I think that was the reason I was seeing go, Florida was.
13:34
And I didn’t only tell myself, I told to anyone else who would listen or not listen, that I could not slow down, including one of my closest friend Patty on a day to day basis like Shar, you have to I can’t I have bills to pay shaking, like I’m going to lose everything, like the grip of death that I had on the I cannot slow down because because I’m in control of everything haha, and everything’s gonna fall apart. There’s a lot of everything’s and always and never is going on, which is usually my sign that I’m in the wrong direction, but I wasn’t willing to slow down enough to see it. And this gave me not only no choice, but it went so far that it was everything was stripped away. It wasn’t just a little bit or a little rest or a week. This was girl you’re sitting down.
14:21
And you did. I mean, you didn’t really, you know, I think there is choice even at the point where you stayed. I mean, a different person built a different way might have said I’ve got to leave and get back to my work. But you are not built that way. I mean, the one place where all of that goes out the window is okay. The people I love need something from me and what do I need to cancel for myself to make that
14:51
work? And it’s funny because it’s I remember talking to you from the hospital. This was the only way my mother gave me the greatest gift because While she says I saved her life, she absolutely saved mine, I would not have stopped any other way.
15:05
And now with that with looking back, when you look back at that, Shari that before she went through that experience, do you think that there were any words you could have said to her because I know there are people listening right now that, you know, here or somewhere else have like heard the message, like, if you are going to receive at a higher level, money, love support, whatever it is, you’re going to have to rest like you’re going to have to stop doing in order to let that in. And they’re saying I can’t write and that’s where you were, is there something you think you could have said to yourself back then that would have shifted things.
15:05
I would love to lie and say yes, but what we’re not covering is who I was, before this happened, I am the person who gets double pneumonia and still works. I, for years ago, broke my foot and had double pneumonia and still kept going. I know this logically, I teach this to my clients, I know how important it is I use the words of like Olympic athletes use rest as actively as they use their training, I know it logically and there was something so tied up in my identity and my safety valve, that I’m embarrassed for myself that it had to go to that degree because God I would have loved to have saved myself and my mother from that lesson. Where obviously both our souls needed to do this together. There’s only so many ways to say you have to until you get made to, and it’s not to disasters, this is the stuff that happens. But even had I slow down, it never would have been to the degree of soul break that I gave myself. Sure I would have taken a break or Okay, okay, fine, I’ll go get a massage, or I’ll take a break, you know, the weekends, I’ll rest I’ll stop working all the time, my brain was still going and I my brain had stopped. And I had to stop fixing problems that were never going to be fixed from my brain. And I don’t know, I wish I had the wisdom post this, to have learned something to give to people. And I still don’t have it. Maybe I’m still processing it. I mean, it was it was a real big shock to my life. And it just course corrected me so much that I still look around somewhere. I’m like, How did I land here? It’s so strange still.
17:26
And you know what I want to highlight for someone listening to because we’ve referenced your parents a few times. And so I’ve had the pleasure of meeting them twice. And so for you listening, because I’ve talked about this as you can still wind up in adulthood with these control issues that go back to childhood, and have had fabulous parents. I mean, these people are the most charming, loving love Shari, so much like, and yet you got into adulthood and clearly your mother, we know that this was an ancestral wound. So do you think your mother needed that to rest? Or was it she didn’t even know how to do it. So she brought this into herself, to help you be the conduit to the ancestral like where I didn’t want to
18:22
have thought about it. But now that you said it’s so my mom’s best friend who had MS. And my mom was a real support of she was like an aunt to me. She passed away at the start of COVID. And my mom didn’t get see her before she died and then do a funeral till much later because of the COVID stuff. Where ironically, I think my mom’s best friend chose it because she didn’t want all the fanfare, she was so beloved, that she saw an opportunity to leave the world on her terms. And no one could go, you know, throw a big hoo ha about it. My mom, although very different from me, and personality is very much an over giver. She’s the therapist of her friends. She’s the one who goes and helps a new one. And my mom grew up an only child of Holocaust survivors. She never really had a childhood. She was the third adult very close to her wonderful, incredible parents. But she was always the caretaker, her fifth grade teacher told my grandparents who you know, were very broken English. But she was like the class therapist in fifth grade, she was 10. And the kids would go to her instead of to the teacher to solve problems. So this is a familial habit. I think my mom needed the break. And I think my mom, like my mom is so powerful she could run a small country and didn’t work out of the house helped my dad work, you know, run the business. So I think there was a calling, um, don’t need to speak out of turn, mom when you listen to this, but just from a soul perspective, not as my mom perspective. I think there was a choosing herself, putting herself first that she’d never had a chance to do because of how she was raised. And she never really needed it. She adored the role she was in, but she never got a chance and this was Her second stroke she had a stroke eight years ago that was a miraculous recovery not as miraculous as this one. But like she even says, How many times Is God gonna give me chances to get this right what’s even right after the stroke when she was learning to speak and come to she was very, very deep at the time. She was kind of like in between two worlds, it almost felt like we had these deep conversations. She wouldn’t now remember, it was like I was talking to her soul. Like, what am I missing that God’s trying to teach me? That she’s very religious? So for her, it’s God for other people be whatever it is, is like, what am I missing? How many more chances am I going to get to learn this?
19:11
That is just so deep and cool. And it was crazy. The question that kind of like popped into my head now is when she said to you before you left Florida that got you to stay there. And I can’t pronounce the same Kula nephesh Yes. Beautiful to save a life. Do you think the life she was speaking about was her own or your father or yours?
21:03
I think it was all three of us actually don’t think it was my dad. Ironically, although he’s the caretaker too. He supported her through this, but I think the lessons were me and my mom. And it’s very interesting, because now that I’m saying it, I can translate. So Pikuach means to save nefesh the phrase means life. But nefesh is really like the life force. It’s like the soul. Rather than a physical body. It doesn’t mean goof is how you say the body in Hebrew. So it wasn’t like the life of the body. It was to save the soul. And now I’m covered in goosebumps, as we’re talking about this. I saved her, she saved me. And we did this together. And we both needed it.
21:42
So all of this took place during COVID, when the hospitals were not operating in a way that’s conducive. You know, God bless all the health care workers to all of you out there. I mean, I send you my love and gratitude. But for the conditions, it was not an easy thing to be a family member of someone that was going to be there long term. Do you feel like that contributed to your surrender or didn’t very much
22:14
Okay, interesting that you would even ask that question. So she was in Miami and she was in the ICU for for many weeks. And the ICU floor in the hospital that she was in was a completely COVID floor, they took over the ICU, this one section was still open. So next to her room, I looked at a sign all day that said COVID, soiled linens, there were people coming out of double seal doors with like, full gas masks on and full hazmat body suits. And we sat there in pretend land and the hospital would only let one person in. And both my father and I are very feisty. I got my Maverickness from my father, like, I mean this respectfully, and I don’t mean to disrespect COVID And how much people lost like we were not following that rule. Like we were both going to be in there. So we would have a whole system. My dad, of course, being him, made friends with the mean, bitchy lady at the front, and only he would be able to get in. I was off the grid. I was like, I went off the matrix for four or five days, I didn’t leave the building. So my sticker expired, but they didn’t know that I was still in the hospital. I just didn’t leave so he could come and go like we there were so many weird things that should not have happened. That happened in the midst of this. The night my mom had her stroke. So we for the first few days, we didn’t know what was going on and ended up. I was next to her when she had the stroke. And I saw her arm drop and I knew something was wrong. The way it played out is even crazy. We had to wait five days to take a certain test. And the test that she had was the way we knew she had a stroke had she had it earlier, she probably would have died because we wouldn’t have known she had a stroke. There were so many crazy things that happened within it. And the night that happened, we didn’t know she was going to make it. The nurses like okay, you guys have to leave. I was like, I’m not leaving. So we have to figure out a way to stay and I am not forceful like that. I’ll eat spoiled food in the restaurant. So like the level of standing up for myself and her and owning what I deserve and facing all of the parts of me all the things that Patty teaches in receiving school came with such force. All of this is so hard for me. And there none of it was it was like I was suspended above and the nurse felt the energy and also saw my hysterical tears. They let me say and just close the curtain like that does not happen. But it came with such clarity and such intense energy that there was not an option for No, there was I mean talk about universal 100% Like I was fully there. There was no worrying about anyone else. There was no it was my mother. That was it, whatever it was gonna take.
24:50
And that’s so amazing that your grandmother figured out I mean, not amazing that she figured you out but that was When every other attempt the universe made to get you to understand that you had to slow down didn’t work. They took your one. You know, like the one thing I know about you that you will not move on as you will move heaven and earth to take care of your people. Yes. And when that required you just standing in place and asking for what you needed, you were only able to do it because it was in service to that, that
25:30
100%. And it didn’t even feel like a choice. It was like something took over in me and the serendipity is that happens in there. So the number 444 was a massive play with her room number it was really remember that everyone was sending me it was everywhere. It was on her numbers on the monitor. It was everywhere the entire time. On a taxi on the one break, I would take outside like to a degree that did not make sense. It was almost like a bad B movie where they went too far. And it seemed like alright, slow down. Because this is ridiculous. There were two pigeons that I know where my grandmother and grandfather, who were at the window every single day we’re talking Miami, crazy rain, weird weather in September and October. They didn’t leave we then finally after weeks, she moved to a regular room. The birds came to us to the other side of the hospital, they did not leave our side like there was crazy shit that went down. That does not happen almost like those biblical miracles. You always wonder like, how did that stuff happen? That’s what it felt like it was like being in a really weird movie.
26:32
And not that all of that doesn’t already encapsulate it. But just for you listening that day that I found out. I think it was the day that you found out for sure she had the stroke. And I then I think her room was getting moved and she got moved to room 444 Wasn’t that it? And that was like and it was
26:51
every no actually the first room was 444 because when she first arrived to the hospital, they wouldn’t let me in and when we finally because only my dad could go to the emergency room. The next morning when they finally let us in and I sat outside the hospital the whole night, just sitting on a bench waiting. And we go to the front desk and I’m all shaking up. Like what’s the room and the woman you know, they work at the hospital and they’re very annoyed and we’re all wearing masks, very stressful environment. She doesn’t even look up she goes through 444 and I lost it. I lost it. I’m like she’s gonna be fine. I don’t know how which is going to be fine.
27:22
And when you told me that, okay, now I’m gonna point the lens back at me even though it’s your beautiful story I that it was a Friday. So whatever that was, because that’s what I will know. Because this was the receipt I went to go get pizza for my family and the receipt and someone in we get the exact same thing every Friday and someone wanted something different. And the total was 4444. It was crazy. And you know, I’m all over the signs. But and then you were sitting outside I don’t know if you said this one and the cab pulled up right and that
27:58
was up in the cab was 4444444 It not only pulled up it stopped in front of me backed up a little bit. So I saw it and then drove off it was then 100 Now I posted it on Facebook and then no exaggeration, hundreds of people from all over the world. My son was in Israel at the time. And he’s trying to keep track of what’s going on he sends me a screenshot and he’s not spiritual like this at all. He was checking the data on his Israeli SIM card 444 receipts from people times. Gas stations, like it was everywhere, everywhere.
28:36
And do you because I think someone listening could potentially be in a in a crisis situation really where they need that level of sign. Do you feel like you did something to call in that? That amount of signs.
28:51
I opened them aloud. Because they don’t come anymore like that. Just me. 444 still sneaks up and I was it’s like a wink of like, okay, chill yourself out. I was driving on the highway the other day and there was a billboard, the phone number was 4444444 and it was for a low illegal company and a Tesla like we’re always with you right above the number. And now I just laugh like it doesn’t happen all the time. And like Patty does the scavenger hunts in her membership group I never see the things like trust me I’m not this magical being that it happens to I’m back to being my jaded self a lot of the time not all the time. I’m definitely better than I used to be but like my default is come on. So like I want whoever’s listening who isn’t sure about the stuff not to be like like I used to be this is great and I know what happens it just doesn’t happen to me. It happens to you when you let it and when you stop letting it it stops happening as obviously I was so open and so ready for prayers to be answered ready to be shown something that it’s like I stepped into someone else.
29:53
Because I’m gonna put words in your mouth but you can push back on this because not believing In the divine, the ability to impart a miracle in your life was scarier than believing in it at that point. And it
30:09
was so funny because I remember either texting or calling I’m like, I feel a level of faith, like in each cell, which I don’t feel, and I grew up religious and, you know, had a evolving relationship with the strictness of the religion that I grew up in. So like, this is not the spiritual things, not new for me. And it was a relationship. I had to re-jig. So it was a complicated one. And it was I could feel it pulsing through me. It wasn’t even a question of, oh, let me just give this a whirl. It was all there was.
30:41
And I don’t want to kind of jump over this part because it is, you know, this part of your life because it was so significant. And I hope if you’re listening, you understand because Shari, granted was forced, but you know, could have fought it a little did kind of drop into surrender. That’s why this onslaught of, you know, signs came through. So this, this does you do, you know, come out the other side of that. And at that point, was that when you had a job offer, or was that
31:13
so I had come home, this was interesting. Both you and I have a very close friend, Patricia Lohan, and that we did her Fung Shui experience. So I had been gone. I was gone from September and I went home at the end of May, right before my son came home from Israel. Going home was terrifying, leaving everything was terrifying at the time. And I came home and I hadn’t put in place my Feng Shui remedies from February when the new Chinese year came. So I came home and I not only decided to put my Feng Shui remedies in, I decided with all of my extra energy after the year I’d been through, there was something about I needed to redecorate my whole house or something pulling me. I had lived here for a long time. I’ve lived here since I got divorced 13 years ago, had a lot of old energy and there was something bubbling up inside of me like telling me the middle of the night you got to go home and change everything. So I came home I was home for about two days and then spent the next two weeks painting decluttering got rid of donated sold all of my furniture in my living room and my kitchen, my dining room and started from scratch. But all the remedies and it was like I refuse to come back the old person I was to step into who I was. And about. So that was June and I finished decorating I’d say July in August, someone messaged me whose mastermind I was in a few years before who stayed close friends with me message out of nowhere on a Facebook Messenger Voice Note I honestly we were friends. I thought it was just checking like see how I was, see how my mom was you said we need to speak is mother and stepfather. Were running the coaching department of this big marketing and sales training company in England, which is where most of my clients are. And he said it’s basically in his sentence. It’s time we talk, I want to hand you the keys to the kingdom. My mom and stepdad are retiring. I wasn’t looking for a job. I wasn’t looking for a role. But I was trying to figure out how to find the energy to get my income steady again, I had slowed down so much and thank God was able to, I got oh, this was another thing Patty Lennon got involved in. I don’t like financial numbers. I don’t like looking at this stuff. And then we have Patty who likes this stuff, telling me apply for a small business loan in the middle of COVID. I’m like I’m not doing it. I don’t know what I’m doing. And I was at my dad’s, I never would have done it on my own. Even though Patty told me to do it, I get very overwhelmed looking at that stuff. My dad’s bookkeeper from his company, he’s really good with this stuff. And he’s like, just call I don’t remember what the guy’s name is. He’ll give you the paperwork. He did it for me in about an hour and a half. I got two loans that got forgiven by the government that covered six months of my life financially because I would not have asked my dad for help even though I could have and I wouldn’t and it got completely taken care of which is money trust for me is the biggest thing that’s hard for me to trust I add that on like that’s an add on and that was a biggie completely taken care of. And I came home and I still had a couple of months money of that and I needed Okay, let’s get back on the marketing sales track and I was so tired from everything that happened. And my dream job that I wasn’t looking for a role that was basically made for me was handed to me and it’s now been my one year anniversary working there and I’m it’s the best thing that’s ever happened.
34:29
Oh my goodness, I completely
34:31
forgot about it also did I just remembered as
34:33
you Okay, so a couple of things I want to say. So if you’re listening and you don’t you’re not an entrepreneur, you don’t have your business or business. Just the thing is sales and marketing is something that if you have a lot of energy can be a lot of fun. But if you are in the kind of place that Shari was in, it really can be a huge I would say problem and I see that also for you entrepreneurs out there if you’ve just come off of You know, huge caretaking responsibility, whether it’s small children, aging parents, whatever, and you cannot get that ball rolling, just understand that there’s like a tremendous amount of creative energy that’s needed. So to be able to bypass that and go straight into a space of just managing clients and just being able to work in your zone of genius, I think it’s just, you know, just such a beautiful, a beautiful gift that you got Shari in such an interesting way. But I do want to just reflect on something for you, Shari, and also for you listening because I think sometimes, there’s an idea that when you have faith, that that faith makes you unshakable that if you have unshakable faith that you are unshakable, and for me, personally, as your friend while you were going through that. I love you. And it’s not the only time during our friendship, there have been a few times where I felt very frustrated with the divine plan. Yeah. And when you were down there with your mother, I was really, really in a place of, I trust you divine, and you’re breaking my heart. And I remember exactly where I was, when you called me to tell me that the loan came through? Yeah. Because it was like oxygen, to what I felt was a situation that was running, you know, as beautiful as surrender sounds. You guys were running on heart fumes. Yeah, I was so grateful. For that moment. I really was.
36:47
I want to tell the people listening, I did not slip into a pretty surrender. This was not a cloud that floated me. And I felt good. I fought it every second, I would quietly go into the bathroom, scream into a towel and come back out and do it again. I had to reteach my mom how to use the bathroom. I was sitting on the floor, singing her Yiddish songs, she wouldn’t get out of the wheelchair, like, out of respect for her. I don’t want to go into all the details. But like, this was hard. I was angry, I was tired. Even the loan stuff, there was an easy way for me to do it. And I didn’t even see it as an out. I’m like, kind of fill out another goddamn piece of paper, like, everything felt so efforty, even in the surrender, because it was so foreign to me that I didn’t even know how to trust it while it was working. I can talk about it retroactively and be like, Oh my God, that stuff happened. I didn’t notice it in the moment. It just felt like I was in a weird movie. And I didn’t know my lines to the play.
37:51
That’s such a good summary.
37:53
It’s horrible. And now I’m annoyed now like, I wish I enjoyed it more, because it was so beautiful. I feel like I missed it. Well,
38:02
I think I can tell you because you’re still not as far away from it as I am from when I took care of my mom, you know, going through cancer is that over time, it’s like seeds were planted. And over time, those seeds will start to grow. And although you couldn’t enjoy it in that moment, it will give you access to dropping into other moments that you wouldn’t have been able to do otherwise.
38:32
It’s interesting to say that because I see myself now, I definitely have a My harder shell back up to a degree. But as you just said, I can drop down faster. It doesn’t take me as long I know what I’m doing when I’m doing it. I’m much more aware. Because I now have a different experience. I know what the opposite feels like I didn’t know before, which is what I would say to you over and over again. I hear you and I get it. But I don’t know how I don’t know what to do. And your whole point was stopped doing and I didn’t know what that meant.
39:02
Yeah, you didn’t actually have a physiological memory no to guide you know. And that’s a good point for you listening. You know, if you don’t have that fit, like you actually like viscerally don’t understand what that looks like or what it means. What would you shari, Do you have any thoughts on like how someone could access like create that memory for themselves? Well,
39:28
the only way that I learn because I’m so cerebral, and I’m very creative. So I always say like a strength of mine is how creative I am also my biggest weakness how creative I am because I can create disasters that aren’t even happening and then believe that my create my own monsters and I’m scared for my closet, and I’m the one who put them in there. So I had to get back in my body which is very hard for me very hard for me. But when I was down to my body feeling my body that was different from my head, so I’d say whatever it is you’re not used to feeling if you’re very cerebral, get in your body. If you’re very physical and somatic start using your creativity. It’s like flip the hourglass upside down. So the sand moves differently. That was the only way I still can move myself. Weirdly like I need to light a candle I have to change the smell. It’s very sensory for me now because it makes me stop thinking so much.
40:21
Such good advice. So, now you have your own podcast. So I know people are listening right now and thinking Where do I get more of Shari?
40:32
So I have two podcasts both seat both have seasons, restarting again soon. One is called the shamble show, which is Sherry rambles, because I do that’s a solo show. And then the other one is called Mavericks in motion. My whole brand is about being a maverick. So I have a show called Mavericks in motion where I interview some of the most incredible people you can ever come across who’ve done amazing things in the world. And we talk about what makes them tick. What scares them all this stuff, they never get asked by everyone else who answers we use them. I like to get under the hood of what makes someone different than you know, we all put these kinds of people on a pedestal where we all have this in us. It’s like how do they tap into it? And how do they get through the things that stopped them and scare them in order to create a different mindset to be able to do amazing things.
41:19
Ah, so good. Do you want to give people any other way to get in touch with
41:23
you, Instagram or Facebook? I’m Shari Tiegmann. I love meeting new people. So come say hi.
41:28
And we’ll put that all in the show notes. So Shari, do you have any last words of wisdom for someone watching, understanding this is all about making space for magic and Lord knows the magic was kind of shoved in to your life through very small cracks in the
41:45
in the armor? Yeah, I have to be self aware enough to say that it was that extreme. Because I am that extreme. I love that hard. I get scared that hard change had to be that. So I think it’s really I’d say the space for magic and Patty’s, whole philosophy. What I love about how you teach is, you really make it’s so individual because there is no five steps to it. And as frustrating as that may be to someone who just wants the damn five steps. What I love is the receiving school specifically, but all of your stuff in general, is about coming home to listen differently so that you can hear what those steps are. And even when you do give steps like the receiving school process, it’s about untangling to find your own combination lock to go in. So it’s not any more stuff to do. It’s what do we need to stop doing? Which parts do we need to bring back in. So we have more of ourselves to figure out what we need. And that’s been, I think, the biggest learning of you as a mentor, and then you as a friend, which is what made me choose you as a mentor, because that’s not always an easy role to switch into, like, I’d rather keep you as my friend than put you on a pedestal, you know, and I know you don’t want to be on a pedestal. But it’s a choice to make is that when you have people around, you actually live and breathe what they teach and talk about it vulnerably it makes it so much easier to find your own truth within their process because the vulnerability lifts the velum up of what feels true for someone else, but we don’t know how to do it for ourselves. And I think just the the way you model growth, the way you model, being a human being being a spiritual being being a leader, being someone who doesn’t want to be a leader, it just kind of happened like just this. The beautiful way in which you allow all of us in who watch you like I watched you this morning, and I I love you all the time, you’re always on my gratitude list. But like I watched some of that I choose as one of my closest friends because the universe brought us together. I’m listening to you on your Monday, Oracle Card Reading from this the magic lounge, your membership that I love is you’re crying because of how the air supply concert went. It’s like just the raw and I just I burst out crying and I just I just love who you are and how you do what it is there are no stock answers. There’s no demanding of go back and read the book and go back. It’s just this depth of active listening, active surrender true understanding. Such a deep caring that it makes it so easy to be around you and transform in front of you because the mess is not only okay, but it’s how we do this.
44:30
Well thank you for that, my friend. I love you so much. And I think that last part the messy is how we transform.
44:37
Yeah, I don’t like it either everyone, but it works.
44:41
Oh, Shari, thank you so much for being here with me. Thank you for having me. And for you listening. Thank you for sharing this time with us and remember, make space for magic. Hey, thanks for listening. If you know someone who needs to hear this message, please share this episode with them. And if you’re We’re feeling really generous. I’d love for you to leave us a review at your favorite podcast app. It helps us reach many more people and it fills my heart with so much joy. When I hear what you have to say about what I’ve shared. I’m cheering for your success. Have an amazing day. And don’t forget, always create space for magic.
45:32
This podcast is part of the sound advice FM network. Sound Advice FM, women’s voices amplified
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