He doesn’t appreciate me! 
I can’t even count the times I shared that lament with my girlfriends.
I do EVERYTHING around here and all he does is go to work and come home. You’d think the lout could at least show a little appreciation!
Appreciate. Appreciate. Appreciate.
Before I learned to move my needs up the priority list, I was very conscious of how much other people (including my husband) did not appreciate all I did for them. But once I was finally able to be honest with myself, I realized I was telling myself a lie.
When I talked about how little I was appreciated, what I was really saying was “I’m okay with putting my needs last, shoving me to the bottom of the priority list as long as someone else takes care of me and treats me like the goddess I am.” And here is the truth:
We teach the world how to treat us by the way we treat ourselves.
The truth was that I didn’t appreciate ME. I rarely gave myself credit for all I accomplished. Doing so is my responsibility first and foremost. I wasn’t willing to truly appreciate myself but I expected everyone around me to appreciate me.
Crazy, HUH?
I’ve learned a lot since then.
Now I know when I find myself affected by the way someone else treats me (especially my nearest and dearest), I turn it around on myself.
So if you’ve been telling yourself life would be better if only “My husband (or ex-husband) would appreciate me more,” turn that around and ask yourself:
How much do I appreciate ME?
I think you’ll find the answer to that question hold the real secret to your happiness
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